Living a great love life means loving and
appreciating ALL THAT IS.
After all, we can’t get to a place of true love
and of deep connection unless we are open to
seeing the WHOLE PICTURE - both good and bad.
When you recognize a man as someone wonderful,
that is part of living a great love life.
And so is recognizing that a man has
shortcomings of HIS OWN, and feeling not anger
but COMPASSION for him.
Get some Real Dating dating secrets
Lots of women become hurt and blame or criticize
a man for being less than they want him to be.
Or they take his shortcomings personally, as
though they all mean something about THEM.
When a man does hurtful, painful or dishonest
things in a relationship with women… a man is
saying more about WHO HE IS than the woman he’s
with.
When you choose to live your life with
love, it’s your role to see your relationship
for WHAT IT IS.
Living your standards is accepting what is and
coming to terms with whether or not this man and
this relationship is really right for YOU.
Living your standards is not dwelling on WHAT
ISN’T, and suffering and falling apart because
you wish things were different.
I think you’re starting to see where I’m going
with all of this.
I talk in detail about how to communicate your
standards to the man in your life so that he’ll
not only listen… but he’ll start treating you
differently in your relationship.
I discuss how to approach the conversation
and share what you want with a man in a way that
will make him even more interested and attracted
on page 246 of my eBook.
When a man is with a woman, if he sees that she
doesn’t just want a relationship for the sake of
a relationship… then the ways he sees her and
treats her will become instantly different.
The strange thing about men is that when a
woman is loving AND willing to walk away from
a relationship that isn’t good enough for her…
men become instantly ENGAGED on an emotional
level and want to find a way to be a better
partner and make her happy.
But if a man senses from your emotions that you
are more attached to the relationship than you are
to your own happiness - he’ll often start thinking
of your relationship as less valuable to him.
I know this all sounds strange and ridiculous,
but it’s the way men think and act.
For more tips on exactly how a man can
recognize you as the amazing and valuable woman
you are, and how to dial up the passion and love
between you through a few simple words…
I’d recommend checking out my eBook and
going to page 248 where I describe how to push
what I call a man’s “secret communication button”.
Speak his language, and he’ll adore you for
it and want nothing more than to shower you with
affection and his deepest commitment in love.
It’s all here in my eBook that you can download
now and be reading in just a few minutes.
Don’t wait when all this growth and possibility
for more love in your life is right in front of
you.
WHERE TO START WITH TURNING YOUR RELATIONSHIP AROUND
Alright, let’s get to some specifics.
First things first if you’re looking to turn
your relationship around -
Step 1: Break The Cycle
We often have a hard time seeing the situations
we are in while we are in them.
When we’re in a relationship that feels stuck,
or isn’t working… it’s often impossible to see
how we are feeding into the very problems we want
to resolve or understand.
The very best thing to do if you feel an
unhealthy or negative pattern in your relationship
isn’t to TRY HARDER to fix or solve things.
TRYING HARDER is the first and most common
mistake that most women make when they sense that
something is off in their relationship.
Trying harder only draws you and him deeper
into the cycle you’re already experiencing.
You have to stop perpetuating the energy that
is coming from what isn’t working.
The more you stay with these feelings, the more
you will perpetuate more of the same.
To affect change, you have to be willing to
step outside of your own habits and patterns.
A great way to do this is to simply stop
arguing, complaining, or trying to make any kind
of point about your feelings, or about him.
Do this even just for a day, and go about your
life with excitement and interest, and you’ll
be amazed at what can transpire while you’re not
even trying.
Men LOVE to be with you when you are present
and simply living for the moment in your life.
Your stepping away from the energy that has
been in your relationship will instantly make
things feel lighter.
And you can approach things once you start to
see some new and better energy between you.
Step 2: Get “Grounded”
Ground yourself and get yourself to a place of
positive well-being.
We all know that we aren’t our best with others
when we aren’t feeling great about ourselves, or
our relationship.
Do yourself a favor and before you engage in any
discussion about your relationship, put yourself
in a more grounded and loving place inside.
When you put more love into the things in your
life, you almost always get more love in return.
A few simple ways to do this are:
-Take a long hot bath when frustration or anxiety
strikes, and put your attention into your SENSES
for just that time
-Be active. When our body moves, it also helps
move and clear our mind
-Remember to BREATHE. Breathing deeply for just
4 or 5 deep full breaths in and out can instantly
fill you back up emotionally and put your heart
and mind in a better place
Now, once you’re grounded, you’re in a much
better place to think and feel clearly about
your relationship, and how to approach talking
about it with your man.
Step 3: Consider Your “Approach”
It’s great to share our feelings, and to know
how we feel.
When we grow and mature as adults, we take a
critical step -
We learn to “own” our emotions, instead of
having them own us.
That way, we aren’t just running on auto-pilot
letting any feeling or thought that comes to us
take over and run the show.
We become more CONSCIOUS, and we can learn to
OBSERVE our own thoughts and feelings in the
moment as they come up.
This, I would argue, is one of the very most
valuable and important skills to have in a
relationship.
Why?
Put simply, because it allows us to stay focused
and directed at POSITIVE OUTCOMES in our life.
If what you want is to feel CONNECTED to your
man, but you allow some of your feelings of
sadness to cause you to lash out or CRITICIZE HIM…
Then it’s very unlikely that he’s going to
respond positively and CONNECT back with you.
Step 4: When In Doubt, Love What Is
There’s only one way to live a satisfying and
fulfilling life.
Or to have a satisfying and fulfilling
relationship.
And that’s to love your life, or your
relationship, for exactly how it is RIGHT NOW.
Loving what is isn’t something that most of
us are used to doing.
Often times in our lives we feel alone and
as though if we didn’t try so hard to hold
everything together that it would all fall apart.
Not true.
Try it once. Try not holding your world
together and feeling like you have to worry or
struggle for every outcome.
The amazing thing is… the sun still rises,
and the world still goes on without your willing
it to do so.
Men in relationships love nothing more than
a woman who both is in touch with her feelings…
And who can still go about her life in a loving
and open way even when things aren’t exactly the
way she wants them to be.
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen
women become upset with a man for something that
the man (naively) didn’t know would hurt her
feelings, and she pushed him away out of fear.
Striking out when we feel hurt is a sure
way to create more bad feelings and
misunderstanding in your relationship.
Yes, men can and should be more understanding
in these situations and care for your feelings.
But it doesn’t always work that way.
Wouldn’t you rather know how to actually
talk to and share with “the other sex”, and
know that you could always get the connection
and understanding you really want…
Rather than trying to DEMAND that a man see
you and understand your feelings, and hoping
that things work out?
If you’d like to take yourself and your
relationship out of that UNCERTAIN place where
you don’t know if you’ll be able to stay close
and connected, then a great place to start is
knowing how open, honest and loving COMMUNICATION
works inside a relationship.
One challenge too many women have is not
having a good man they are close to who they
can look to in order to see how a good man really
talks and acts in a close relationship.
Lots of women just don’t have a good man as
a “model” to work from.
You don’t have to keep guessing. I’ve taken
years to put it all together and show you how
a man and woman can come together and become
close through simple every day communication.
For all my very best tips on how to help a man
understand you and listen better in your
relationship…
And to make it so that even a man who’s never
really shared his deeper feelings will open up, you
need to watch my “Communication Secrets” program.
All my very best tips for talking to a man in
a relationship that have turned thousands of
women’s relationships around are right here:
Dating Advise
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